The Tale of Tails
by Lilly Barker
Summary: Death; it can make one realize the things that were always there but never shown. And when Remus Lupin thought that his friend Sirius Black had died everything he had told himself he would never admitt finally surfaced and bubbled over.
1. Chapter 1

Curled up in a small ball I sat in the corner

Curled up in a small ball I sat in the corner. My legs held close to my chest, the tears ran down my face, as they had for the last few hours. I couldn't help in, he was lost and now I'd never have him. He had gone out looking for me and now he'd never end up back here. I felt my heart pain me again as I thought of look that must be on his face right now. All the scraps he must have all over him, or anything that was worse. Why did I have to be so dumb? I should have gone after him, but I was scared he might judge me for how I was. Yes he had seen me like this before but never at this state.

The blood dripping from my long fangs from the last animal I had devoured. I couldn't face him that way. The last look I saw on his face was a look of fear a look that I had never seen on his face before. This was a new look for me. Why was it that he never showed fear, or maybe I should be asking why was it that it surprised me that he could show fear? Everyone gets scared sometimes right?

And then my thoughts stopped my ears had picked up a noise, the noise of a door opening. Then I heard the footsteps, then the breath, and then—"Moony!" Sirius screamed running into the room and pulling me into a hug. "I thought I had lost you back there." He whispered in my ear.

"I'm sorry Padfoot I didn't mean to scare you." I said looking away from him. I could face him, again.

"Moony it's okay, I mean…just don't freak me out like that again okay?" He said pulling out of the hug. "We can't lose you. I mean think about how much detentions we'd have from Evens if you weren't here to convince her some how that we don't need them." He laughed. I nodded. "Have you been crying?" He asked as his hand stretched out and wiped away a tear that was still making its way down my cheek.

I pulled away from his touch; the tingling sensation was making me shiver. "Yea a little, you scared me too." I said looking away again. He grabbed my arm as I tried to walk away. "I'm okay Moony, you're okay. Everything is fine now, you don't have to worry." He said trying to catch my eyes but they drifted away again from his.

"I know, I know. You need to get cleaned up Sirius. Come on we can and see Madam Pomfrey." I said wiping my face on my ripped sleeve and walking over to the door.

"Remus why won't you look at me?!" He ask angrily. I closed my eyes and opened the door. "I don't want to talk right now Sirius, let's just get cleaned up, okay?" I said still not looking over at him.

"No Remus it's not okay! You're my friend! Friends talk and friends look at each other! You're not getting off with this!" He said pulling me back into the room I was trying to walk out of and the conversation. "Tell me what's wrong!" He demanded again.

"I thought I had lost you in the woods. I thought that you would never find your way back here. I thought…I thought you were dead." I said quietly. "I don't know what I'd have done if you were really gone."

"Remus—"Can we just go now Sirius, I don't want to talk about this anymore." I said wriggling my arm out of his hand and walking over to the door again. "I'm sorry…I don't know why but I am." Sirius said still standing in the middle of the room.

"If there's no reason to be sorry don't tell me you are! You don't have to feel sorry for me!" I said bitterly as I finally walked out of the room.

XxXx

"How are you feeling Mister Lupin?" Madam Pomfrey asked as I sat down on one of the beds. "Fine I guess," I mumbled.

"Here take this and you can go up to bed you look tired." She said handing me a small glass full of a blue liquid. I gulped it down and thanked her before leaving the wing.

"Common Moony," Sirius said coming up beside me. "You should have went in and got yourself fixed up." I said looking at his face which at the moment wasn't bleeding too bad.

"Nah, I don't like how it smells in there. Anyways I can just get you to fix me up, right?" He said smiling. He seemed to forget what all had gone on in the woods. Did he want to act as if it never happened? Or was he just dropping it for now and then bring it up tomorrow or something?

We walked in silence for awhile before Sirius finally spoke again. "How come you cried when you thought I was dead? I've never seen you cry before." He said looking over at me and for the first time in a long time I looked him in the eyes. And what I saw was not normal. Again like fear another emotion had arised that I had never seen on Sirius' face. It was hard to explain, it was like a sad kind of curiosity.

"You're my best friend Sirius, I don't have many, if I lost you…it'd be like my world had just ended." I said still looking him in the eyes. And this time he looked away. His eyes traveled down to my watch which was exposed. "I-I think I will go get cleaned up. I'll see you later okay." And then he ran off.

Had I scared him? Had I said something that he didn't want to hear? Or had I said just what he thought I would, but that's not what he wanted to hear. And what was with the watch thing?

I walked back up to the common room quietly. I saw the people around me yet at the same time it was as if they didn't really exist. As if they were shadows and nothing more. I couldn't hear them, my head was buzzing with reasons for why Sirius might have run off. And when I got to the painting it took me a moment before I finally realized that she wasn't there. So I sat down and waited for her to get back, or for someone to come out. I had been there for a few minuets before the door finally opened. "Remus what are you doing out here?" The red head asked as she stepped out.

"Waiting for the fat lady to come back." I said sliding up the wall to were I was once again standing. "That's not nice Remus, where's Sirius? I know James is in detention but Sirius just sort of left with out saying anything to anyone."

"I'm not sure." I lied. "But where would our head girl be heading at the hour?" I asked raising my eye brows.

"To porthole t he halls, what else?!" She said glaring at me. "Do you always go potholing the halls in a dress?" I asked smirking as she looked down and blushed. "Okay maybe that's not what I'm doing. But I'm not telling you."

"Oh really you're not are you?" I said smiling as she shook her head and started walking front of me. My smile grew as I reached forward and pulled her into me started to tickle her. Her high laugh echoed off the wall of the corridor. "Merlin Lily you have a loud laugh." I giggled as she tried to wiggle free. Finally she gasped. "I'll tell you." I stopped the tickling and let her speak. "I'm going to see Sirius. I know, I know what you're thinking…but he's not quite the ass James is and—what's wrong?"

I felt my heart rip, he left me to go see her. He asked her out even though he knew that James was in love with her. He betrayed two friends in one night. "What the fuck is wrong with you Lily!?" I yelled and she took a step back. "What do you mean? Why are you yelling at me?"

"You know that James is in love with you yet you go out with Sirius anyway! I mean really Lily I thought you were smarter then that!" I said pushing her into the wall. "Do even realize what James is going to do to Sirius once he finds out?! Are you trying to kill him? And why the hell would he ask you out anyway!? I mean James and him are like brothers!—"Remus he didn't ask me out, I asked him." She said interrupting my yelling.

"And why the hell would you do that?!" I asked trying not yell quite as loud seeing as there were people who were still asleep.

"Because I wanted to. I don't need to explain my reasoning to you!


	2. Chapter 2

As I walked down the stairs to McGonagall's office I found that my rage towards Sirius and Lily was calming, as long as I didn't think about them but as soon as I didn't it seemed as if a bomb had just exploded inside me

As I walked down the stairs to McGonagall's office I found that my rage towards Sirius and Lily was calming, as long as I didn't think about them but as soon as I didn't it seemed as if a bomb had just exploded inside me. And now a thought came to my mind that I really hadn't thought of yet. What would happen to James after he found this out? I mean he was Sirius' best mate. Would they no longer talk? Would they fight over Lily? Or would James just give up on her.

"Hey Remus, how'd you do tonight without me?" James said walking out of McGonagall's office. A smile was on his face even after just having had detention could I really wipe that off his face just so that I could have Sirius punished?

"Well…Sirius got lost looking for me. We both thought the other had died. I made it back to the house before he did but I wish I hadn't, it was horrible waiting for him." I said as he started to head back up to the common room. I felt his eyes on me but I didn't dare look at him. It seems that lately I've been having that problem, with everyone.

"How is he and how are you?" James asked sounding worried. "We're both fine but James there's something I need to tell you about Lily." I said and I now looked over at him. And that's when I realized that I could never tell him what I had found out. He was too in love with Lily to know.

"What Moony, what!?" James asked jumping up and down and pulling at my sleeve. He was acting like a small child, which really shouldn't surprise me seeing as that's how he always acted.

"She…she already went out on porthole and said that she'd take over your rout so you could get some sleep." I said sighing to myself. You would think that to most people that news wouldn't be all that important but James always found some new meaning behind Lily's words.

"Really that's what she said? She wants me to get some sleep! She really dose care about me then! Oh I need to go thank her!" James said jumping around and getting ready to run off when I grabbed the back of his shirt. "James I think that you should do what she said and get some sleep then if you slept well you can thank her in the morning." I said still holding onto the back of his shirt.

"That's a good idea. I'll be more awake and can think of better things to say then. Yeah, I like that. You know you're really smart Remy." James said wriggling out of my grip and started to run off to the common room. "I'm gonna go get started on that sleep!" He yelled back to me. I laughed and started on my own way up. I was tried yet at the same time I was feeling nosy. I wanted to see what time Sirius got back.

As I walked into the common room I decided that I was going to wait up for Sirius and Lily. So I took my seat in one of the chairs in front of the fire place, which had a perfect view of the door too. I felt myself sink into the chair's soft cushions. The heat from the fire place combined with the soft cushions was making me sleepy. I felt my eye lids start to droop but I tried to stay awake. But I was losing the fight.

XxXx

"Sirius stop, stop!" a high voice said before giggling was heard. "Shh…Sirius stop it! Quiet there are people who are sleeping!"

"Oh yeah Lily that's so going to stop me, you know it's worked so many other times." A deeper voice said.

I opened my eyes and let out a long breath before looking over to the door. And there they were; what I had come down here for. But now seeing them in front of my eyes I wished I hadn't. Sirius' arms were around her waist and she was pulled close to him. His lips were placed on her neck and she was giggling. I tried to keep my eyes off them but they keep wondering back. They hadn't seen me yet and I was guessing they wouldn't by how this was going. Looking over at the clock I found that it was almost three in the morning.

"Common Lily you have your own room right? I think if we do it in mine Peter might go insane." Sirius laughed as he pulled her off towards the girls stairs. She laughed and shook her head. "Sirius I don't have sex on the first date. I'll see you in the morning alright?" She said stepping up on to the first step.

"No Lily that's not alright. You know you want to. Everyone—"Sirius, w-what are you doing? Remus why are you down here?" James' voice was heard from the men's dormitory stairs. Everyone's head was turned towards him, we watched as he made his way down the stairs. Every step seemed thunderous. And when he reached the end of the stairs the whole room was silent. No one blinked, nor breathed, and no one spoke. James made his way across the room to Lily and Sirius. Sirius' hands hadn't moved from Lily's thigh his fingers cover by the end of her light green dress. And Lily's jade eyes were as big as saucers. And me, well I was close to passing out from the lack of breathing.

"Lily I-I thought you were out doing Head Girl duties. And Sirius I thought you were in the hospital wing. And Remus I…I don't even know why you're down here." James said turning around and facing me. I stood up and felt my face burn.

"Remus…you knew didn't you. Why didn't you tell me?" James said looking back at Lily and Sirius. Sirius had moved his hand and was now turning away from Lily.

"I'm sorry James I just…I didn't want to hurt you. I thought this was better." I said looking down at my feet. I had thought this was better, I mean the look of excitement that was in his eyes who would want to take that away.

"You thought lying to me was better? You thought telling me that the girl I loved was not out on a date with my best friend. You thought that—"I said I was sorry James! What else do want me to do I mean it's not like I can turn back time and tell you everything that happened! I mean—why is there a giant banana floating around the room?" I said as the big yellow curved fruit made its way over to me and hit me on the head.

XxXx

My eyes again opened. I looked around the room and this time no one was in here. This time there was no giggling Lily, there was no horny Sirius, and there was no upset James. Looking over at the clock I saw it was two fifty six. Four more minuets before Sirius and Lily would come in. Two more till James would hear their noise. I could stop him from finding out. All I had to do was—"Sirius stop, stop!" Lily's voice giggled from the door. "Shh…Sirius stop it! Quiet there are people who are sleeping!"

"Oh yeah Lily that's so going to stop me—"Padfoot, get your arse up stairs before James makes his way down here!" I said popping up and pulling the teen away from the red head.

"Oi, what the hell are you thinking Moony!?" Sirius said and I hit him across the face. "If you wake James up I swear you will not be here in the morning to see the sun rise!"

He grunted and then said over his shoulder to Lily. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight Sirius and Remus…?" She said, I turned around to face her and she smiled. "Thank you," And then she was upstairs up to her own bed room. I stood for a moment staring at where the girl had been standing, her red hair down from its usual pony tail. The purple dragon fly clip keeping her bangs from falling in her face. And that was when I noticed that her dress had gone unnoticed. A moment of realization, girls no longer did a thing for me. This was new.


	3. Chapter 3

"Mooney how did you know we were gonna be down there

"Mooney how did you know we were gonna be down there?" Sirius asked as I started to change. I shrugged and lied to him.

"I didn't know, I had fallen asleep and woke to Lily's giggles. I knew that if I could be woken by that James would be down there in a heart beat," Okay so maybe it wasn't a total lie but still I wasn't telling him the full truth either.

"Are you mad at me?" Sirius asked coming up behind me, I turn around to face him. I shook my head, again with the lying.

"Why would I be mad?" I asked though I knew then just as well as I know now why I could have been, and was, mad at him.

"I know James will be. I just…I couldn't help myself. I mean she's Lily Evens!" Sirius said flopping down on my bed. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"Stop saying you're sorry Sirius we all know you never mean it!" I snapped at him as I dug through my clothes looking for a new t-shirt.

"But Remus I really do mean I'm sorry—"I don't need any pity from you Sirius, I told you before. You only say sorry when you feel guilty. And right now you're guilty for going out on a date with Lily and you're trying to get that guilt to go away by telling me you're sorry! I'm not the one who needs to hear this!" I yelled at him, I had given up on finding a new shirt and just pushed Sirius off my bed and crawled under the covers in my boxers.

"I know that I _should_ tell James but…I can't. I mean I think I really like Lily and she likes me right now. I mean—"No Sirius no, you can't, he loves her! And you're his best mate. Really Sirius he's letting you stay at his house! Don't take Lily away from him! Other then his mother and us she's the only good thing left in his life."

"Remus that's not true. And anyways she hates him." Sirius said sitting down on the edge of my bed.

"Stop making up reasons for why it's okay Sirius. You know what you did and tried to do was wrong. Now get your ass off my bed." I said rolling onto my side. I felt Sirius' weight leave the bed and heard him walk across the room to his bed. Peter was still snoring softly two beds away from me. And James hadn't stirred in his room, well from what we had heard.

XxXx

"Remus, can I talk to you for a moment?" Lily asked when I sat down Sunday morning in the great hall.

"Once I'm done eating." I said eating the eggs that were on my fork.

"Hey Lilly Flower, how did you sleep last night?" James asked in a sing-song voice. Lily rolled her eyes at him.

"Fine James. And would you please stop calling me Lily Flower!" She said before walking off to sit with her friends.

"Did you see that Remus?" James asked sitting down next to me at the table. I raised an eyebrow at him. I had no idea what he was talking about. "She called me James not Potter! I think she's warming up to the idea of us." He said smiling evilly. I smiled at him and nodded. Then thought that she probably only called him James because of what I had told her yesterday. She felt guilty too.

"You seen Sirius yet?" I asked before I heard a girl squeal to her friend. "Look there he is!" She was pointing towards the doors of the great hall. There stood Sirius. It was funny he walked into the hall and it was like he was a rock star or something. Every girl's head turned to him, anyone who was in Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, or Gryffindor stared at him, or squealed, or if they were brave actually said something. Now no it was never like a mass mob running after as you'd see in a movie but it was just…funny how they all fawned over him. Each and every one of them believing that they were in love with him, and some, the ones that had dated him, believed that he was in love with them. But the thing none of them really understood was that Sirius never really did fall in love. He was a player and that was for sure. He was as they called him Siriusly Sexy Black, or Sex-God-Sirius. Love wasn't a word that he really knew. Yes it was in his vocabulary and he may use it. The true meaning may not really be known to him. None of them realized this, and at the time I don't really think I completely realized this.

"Hey Prongs we…erm we really need to talk. Soon, like now." Sirius said sitting down opposite James. I felt my eyes widen. He had actually taken in what all I had said to him last night. They both had. Was I really that convincing? He had never listened to me before. I mean sometimes Lily did but Sirius never did. He'd take in what James said; he'd do anything for James. James was like his brother. I mean we were good friends and stuff, best friends really, like brothers just not as strong as James and him.

"What's wrong Sirius?" James asked, he must have noticed the look in his eyes when he told him they needed to talk. Sirius started wiggling, unable to sit still. His eyes kept going over to Lily and by now she was looking over at him. Then I realized something, that date hadn't been their first. In my dream I was wrong, they had been dating for awhile now. I guess those stolen glances I had taken as just shared looks or that maybe Lily was started to warm up to Sirius. That they would be friends or something. Well I guess I was sort of on the right track. But at the same time I was pretty off. Maybe he really did love her or something but so did James. But who knows maybe James will just be happy that Lily has found someone else. Maybe.

"James, promise me you won't yell." Sirius said in a low voice. Everyone around us was busy in their own conversations to notice the one going on at our spot. That's what normally happened, if Sirius sat down here without a girl no one made a fuss. It was like the rules of Sirius-ism.

"Why would I yell Sirius?" James asked tilting his head slightly; making his glasses slide down his nose a little.

"Just promise me you won't make a scene. You can yell all you want once we're out of here. But I just want to tell you now." Sirius said still talking low.

"Okay fine I promise I won't yell." James said and Sirius nodded. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Looking over at Lily I knew she knew what he was doing. And she didn't stop him. Then I wonder if maybe she had talked to him before he had come in. That maybe that was why she wanted to talk to me. You know to tell me the truth. Hear it from her, the person who had asked Sirius out in the first place.

"James…Lily and I have been dating." Sirius said quietly and to my surprise slowly. As if he was trying to make sense of it as he said it. "We have been dating for almost two months now. And she felt it was the right thing to tell you now that…well…she thought that you should know what's going on." Sirius said looking down at the table for most of what he said. Not till finishing it did he look up and see the hurt look James had one his face. James looked over at Lily who wasn't far down. She closed her eyes and nodded, as if saying to him that it was true. And then I realized another thing as I sat there and look at Lily. She was sorry. She felt bad that she had hurt James. She didn't hate him. She was sorry. Lily Evens was feeling sorry for hurting James Potter. Is the world coming to an end? Things seem backwards. Sirius is dating Lily. Sirius has had a girl friend that he hasn't had sex with for the whole two months of dating her. Maybe the world was going to end.

Now James was looking at me. Almost pleadingly he asked. "Did you know?" I knew a grim look was on my face now. I just knew it by the way he looked at me. I shook my head and said. "I only knew that last night they went on a date. I thought it was their first but I guess was pretty wrong huh?" James nodded.

"I'm sorry James but when she asked me out I just couldn't say no. I just…James please don't be mad at me. Remus don't you be mad at me either. I can understand disappointed or something. Just please don't be mad. I wanted to tell you, I really did. I just didn't know how." Sirius said reaching a hand out to each of us. He grabbed James' hand and held it tight, the same to mine. I wanted him to let go. I wanted to pull my hand away. Maybe run off. Because I knew what he was going to say next I just knew it. He was going to say he loves her. My body was tingling with jealousy, towards Lily, and then there were the sensations that I always got when Sirius touched me.

"We never meant to hurt you James. We just wanted to test the waters. You know splash around a bit. But I guess now we're full out swimming because I think…I think I'm in love with her. And I think she loves me too." Sirius was now only holding James' hand. I was left forgotten, just like when I was a child. After having been bitten my parents no longer wanted me. I only remembered my name because it was sown into the back of my shirt. But unlike then, I was forgotten for someone that needed the comfort more then I did.

A tear slid down the pale face of James Potter. He pulled his hand away from Sirius'. "I'm not mad at you Sirius." He said. "I'm not mad at Lily either. I just wish that she could realize that I love her more then the air I breathe. And I wish that you were a good enough friend to know that too." Then he stood up and left. I knew then and there that James had lied. He was mad. He even told me so later, once he and Lily were married, he said he had wanted to knock over Sirius' things, that he wanted hurt him. But I think the thing that really hurt him most was not the fact that she didn't love him but the fact that Sirius had gone after her and 'tested the waters' with her while he knew more then anyone else that James was in love with her. I later realized that I too was mad at Sirius. That I was sad that I had missed out the person I loved. But then again maybe James and I were in the same boat, the person we believed we loved just wasn't the one for us. I think that day James and I grew closer. I think that day I might have moved up a rank in James' friend latter, I was now above Sirius. And I'm not so sure I was happy about that.

XxXx

Over the next few days James was quiet, he did his homework almost right after getting it. Not that this was a bad thing but it just wasn't James. There were no pranks going on, at all. It was just sad how he sat there in the common room doing his homework. I was worried about him, he must be falling apart inside, I knew I was. I just didn't get how I had missed something so big happening with some of my friends. And it just bothered me all day, I just sat there thinking about how in the world could have missed it. I mean now knowing everything I had seen and been confused about seemed so clear and I was just so…so…I just couldn't believe I had missed it.

I felt him staring at me again. Her eyes soon fell to me too. I felt the guilt, maybe even sorrow. I never looked at him anymore, well at least not in a meaningful way.

"Hey Remus, what's up?" Tonks said sitting down next to me. I smiled at her. Today she had amber eyes and bright red chin length bobbed hair. "Are you okay?" She asked reaching over to the arm of my chair and grabbing my hand that lay there.

"Fine, I mean as fine as I can be while all this is happening." I said sighing. I could still feel Sirius' eyes on me. Lily had moved hers, probably back to homework. But Sirius seemed a bit distracted, too focused on me to try and finish his work. I then wondered why he didn't try and tell me he was sorry, I mean I guess he had when he told us but I knew he wanted to say more. But then again maybe he knew it was no use, he at least thought it was. Or maybe he was just scarred, or maybe…well maybe he just didn't know what to say. If that was it that was something different for Sirius, he always knew just what to say. If that was it he must be horribly confused.

"He misses you, you know." Tonks said interrupting my thoughts. I looked back to her confused. "Sirius," She said nodding towards him. "He misses you…a lot. James too. It's like he just lost two brothers, well two brother he actually liked." I nodded and looked down at the floor again. I missed him too. I missed having him around to make us all laugh or tell us some story about what he and some slut had done one night. I missed the person that James was before all this. But I think the thing that I really hated about all this was the fact I knew that even after all this I would still take him back in a heart beat. And I knew that James would do the same with Lily, but it wouldn't really be taking back. I guess we both really had a lot more in common them he really thought.

"I'm off to bed…erm Remus?" I looked up from the floor. "You really should talk to Sirius. Like I said he misses you." Tonks said before heading off to the stairs to the girls' dormitory. For a third year she really was a smart girl. Not the most graceful, she was more like a bull in a china shop then a swan but there was still something about her, something different. Maybe girls weren't a complete waste.

XxXx

The next day (which was Wednesday.) while I was eating breakfast I kept finding myself look at Tonks. Almost observing her, the way she skipped, the way she moved, they way her smile worked. Almost stalker-ish but I couldn't really help it. I did the same thing with Sirius.

"Hey James," I said leaning over towards my silent friend. He lifted his head, glasses tilted slightly. "Is Tonks fourteen yet?"

James bit the inside of cheek, as he did when ever he was thinking hard, then nodded. "Yeah. Her birthday was last month, a few days before Halloween. Well the party was at least. Why do you ask?"

"I was just erm…wondering you know…" I said lamely. Lying as you may have guessed was not my forte. James knew I was lying too. He smirked and then nodded muttering _sure_. I rolled my eyes at least he didn't push it anymore.

I felt his eyes on me again. I tried my best not to look up but he was Sirius Black. He always got what he wanted and he wanted me to look up. His light blue eyes, the eyes that almost belonged to his family, where staring straight at me. They were soft, not laughing for once, but a sad kind of soft. They were filled with sorrow. He looked miserable, it was sad. Tonks was right. I looked away, went back to my food. Though I didn't have any kind of appetite now. I looked over at Tonks she turned and smiled. I was quiet along with James and well Peter just went along with whatever we were doing. Soon we got up to go to class.

"Hey Remy-Baby!" Johnny said popping up next to me in the hall, James and Peter had gone back up to the common room to get their things but I knew Johnny would have my things, he always did.

"Hey John-John." I said taking my book bag from him and slinging it over one shoulder. I looked over at Johnny, something was different about him today. He was still tall, he still had chin length black hair that curled in at the bottom, he still had some of the darkest brown eyes I had ever seen, they were almost black. He looked about the same but there was still something different, just something odd. "What are you staring at?" Johnny said pushing me slightly. I smiled and shook my head.

"Nothing, where were you at breakfast today?" I asked looking him up and down. He was still wearing the school uniform. I don't know but there really did seem like something was different today.

"Oh, I was finishing up the work McGonagall gave up. Only November and she's already given us loads of homework." He said shaking his head, bangs falling into his eyes.

"Hey I was wondering what you thought of Tonks? I mean I know she's really young but you never know, right?" I said feeling my cheeks blush a little at the end. But I knew he wouldn't care. Johnny…well Johnny was truly my best mate. I mean me and James were real tight too and Sirius and I used to be, but I was more in love with him then friends. (And Johnny was the only person who knew that, Johnny knew everything about me.)

"You mean bright head?" I nodded. "Well I didn't think you still fancied girls but yeah she pretty cute for a third year. A bit young though, don't you think?" Johnny said as we arrived at Transfiguration. "You sitting with me today?" I nodded as I opened the door for him. There were about six other people inside. I took my normal seat in the middle of the class. James and Sirius preferred the back but I never wanted to sit all the way back there. You always miss something, and I need good grades…maybe then mum and dad will be proud…maybe. James and Peter walked in and took their sweet time getting to their seats to our right. When Sirius came in he sat a few tables away with Lily and her friends. I looked over at Johnny he smiled at me, he must think I'm crazy with how much I've been looking at him. Maybe he thinks I like him…he is extremely handsome though. He had high cheek bones, a jaw that…the only thing I can think to describe it is that it looked as if angles had come down and crafted it, along with the rest of his face. Look wise Johnny was as beautiful if not more then Sirius. But Johnny had always been a one girl at a time type of guy. Right now he was single but like Sirius that never lasted long. From spending his summers out in Italy with his grandparents his tan was still stunning. Girls _and_ guys fell to his feet while he was single, but once he was taken Johnny Moretti was just another boy. Another difference he had from Sirius.

Sighing to myself I looked up at the board and saw that today was going to be a note day. My head of house sat at her desk with a large stack of papers, watching as the students began to pull out quills and parchment and began to scribble down her notes.

"Hey Remus," Johnny said leaning towards me and whispering to me about ten minuets after we had started to take notes. I looked at him and breathed a small _yeah_. "You are still into guys right?" I nodded "You ever think of letting of…you know?" He said nodding towards Sirius' direction.

"Johnny…I…even if I could who would even want me?" I said look down at the desk. In case you didn't know I had low self esteem. I sighed and then felt a hand on my thigh. _I would…_

**Author's Note:** Yup I did just leave you with that. I'm mean aren't I? Well not really, I've seen worse. Anyways how about you leave me a pretty review telling me what you thought of this chapter. Personally I really liked this one. Oh and the chapters from now on should be about this length, if you think it should be longer or shorter please tell me! And just incase you were wondering yes I did base Johnny Moretti off Ben Barnes who plays Prince Caspian in the second Narnia movie. :DD. Hope I did a good job of description him. Anyways yeah reviews leave some! Got it? Good! _**–Lilly**_


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